Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Friday, April 8, 2011

Riding on High.

I'm so buzzed right now.

Naturally.

I feel like I've had an entire pot of coffee....and hadn't even had a single sip!

Lately, I've been diligently working on shifting my focus and changing thought patterns that haven't served me.  And guess what?!

IT'S BEEN WORKING!!!

For a long time, I'd been focused on what I didn't have and how I was going to go about getting it...especially as it pertained to money. I learned long ago that the thoughts and beliefs that I held were exactly what created my "lack of" this or that.  However, I'd never [until now] been very successful at creating a new experience regarding [especially] my prosperity.  It wasn't until just a few days ago that something really "clicked", and my entire experience completely shifted.

One morning, after a nice little breakfast, I decided to go for a walk.  I didn't have a particular destination, all I knew was that I had to get out of the house and clear my head.  It was a beautiful sunny California day, perfect for smiling and walking.  This particular day, I'd decided to consciously declare my good.  I decided that for this day, I would only see the potential and opportunity in every situation I encountered and be open to all possibilities [more specifically, the coins in my pocketbook].  No limitations.  None whatsoever.  So, I began to walk.  Feeling good.  That was the most important thing.

At the beginning of my journey, I was crossing the street and a thought popped into my head to text a good friend of mine to see if he knew of any gigs where I could earn some quick cash.  Midway into the crosswalk, I said to myself, "I'll contact him later. I want to enjoy this walk and not be on the phone right now."  So, I continued.  [and quite honestly, forgot about that thought shortly thereafter.]

One of my intentions that morning was to recognize the evidence of prosperity wherever I turned.  I decided to go to Amoeba and surround myself with some music vibrations.  I hadn't gone for any reason other than to be in a music centered environment.  Upon entering the Jazz & Classical section, (I was actually in the new T-shirt section browsing framed album covers and other musical oddities), I was greeted by Morgan, one of the employees in the department.  We began talking about all things musical and the store itself.  I mentioned how much I enjoy the store and said, "I'd work here! This place is cool!".  Next thing you know, Morgan says to me, "Well, we're hiring! I know of 3 people who are leaving soon. You should leave your resume at the front."  He even said he'd put in a good word for me!

"Ha!" I laughed to myself...because to get in at Amoeba is a rare deal.  Positions fill up as quickly as they come available.  This was my first sign of prosperity!  [Even though the thought of writing a resume makes me throw up in my mouth a little, the fact that there was a rare opportunity presenting itself made me want to do 10 cartwheels right there on the spot!] "Ok, cool," I thought, "I'll bring in a resume tomorrow."  I left Amoeba feeling energized and continued my walk. Shortly thereafter, I found myself at a nice little coffee shop in Hollywood and decided to have a cup of joe and write. 

My intention with this free writing session was to "get out" all the shit that no longer served me.  And also, to see all the thoughts that were going on in my head.  I was good and into it, writing out my beliefs about my prosperity [and Life in general] and my desire to summon it into my physical experience, when I received a call "out of the blue" from the SAME friend that I thought about texting earlier!  He called me to see if I was available for a 5-day gig beginning in a few days... 
"HELL YEAH I'M AVAILABLE!!!" I said.

Wow! Talk about instant manifestation!
From that moment on, I was a firm believer!
Change your thoughts, change your experience.

I'm super excited about my new Life...my new thoughts and beliefs.  Oh the places I will go!

...and P.S. that 5-day gig...just turned into a 6-day gig!  I start tomorrow!

excitement.

♡.
me

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Congratulations. You're Awesome!

This is how I feel right now.

Everyone deserves a congratulatory pat on their backs for being awesome today.
If you're reading this...
consider yourself awesome.

Not because you're reading this...
but because[!] you've done something awesome.   {yeah!}

Go get 'em tiger!

grrr.

♡.
me

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Love in Search of Inspiration...Inspiration in Search of Love.

I  really expected to write something interesting with that title.

Then I walked away from my computer and then when I came back, I spent an hour on Facebook.
[that site is fucking CRACK! You're all of a sudden clicking thru pages upon pages of random photos and you don't even know why!]

Fuckin' Facebook!

Seeking inspiration...

Sunday, March 6, 2011

Friday, March 4, 2011

Thank You & Merci.

I have so much to be thankful for...and SO many people to thank!


To all of my Family, Friends, strangers....everyone I've ever encountered...THANK YOU for being a part of my journey and adding so much Love to my story. Whether we've even ever met in person or not....if we have crossed paths in any way...I thank You!

I've learned so much from our experiences together...I wouldn't be where I am without You!

I hope that I've been as much of a blessing to You as you have been for me! 

♡.
me

Friday, February 25, 2011

Life Experience...

You know...? Life is a wonderful place to play.  There are so many possibilities and opportunities to experience whatever we can imagine...it just depends on what we choose to believe is possible.

My latest challenge has been to see LA with new eyes.  When I left here over a year and a half ago, I was all doey-eyed and spring chickenish.  On  a mission of self-discovery and heart following.  Moving to Paris on a hunch. Trusting my instincts & jumping completely into the unknown...into the abyss of Alice's Wonderland...in the midst of it all, I found the key that opened the talking door.

My voice.

Now, I'm back in my old matrix as a new me...and it's almost stranger than Wonderland, to be honest.  For some reason, I feel more pressure here than I did when I was floating around the City of Lights [and Love].  I can't really explain it, but it is what it is.
I know for a fact that I've been judging myself pretty harshly and not acknowledging [and remembering!] what I'm capable of...the F.E.A.R can be really heavy at times...bringing me lots of anxiety...but for what? A thought?

Funny thing is, for me, my mojo came so much more easily in Paris.  One would think that on "home turf", things would be a breeze...but there's a comfort factor here that leaves room for more stuckness.  My most significant challenge since I've been back in the States, has been allowing my personal growth.  I forget that I'm a butterfly...and instead of recognizing that and allowing my new wings the time to dry...I mentally jam myself back into that old cocoon. Whereas, in Paris, everything was fresh & new, and the shear excitement of it all kept me on my toes. There's no time for judgment when you gotta learn a new language and survive in a foreign land!  I mean, there was fear, don't get me wrong--there was plenty of it--but, I was able to work through it much faster...I had to!  

Saying all that to say...

I did my first "LA performance" a couple of weeks ago at an open mic and, let me just say, "OH! What a feeling!"  It was like a drug!  Dancing and singing with ├╝ber talented musicians took me to a place I'd never been before.  I want MORE!
I rode on that energetic high well into the following day.  What a great experience! 
[Admittedly, I was still very shy with my voice...I felt it...but, nonetheless, I worked out so much shit on that stage.  It makes me wonder why I'm so shy to continue!]

Petit a petit, l'oiseau fait son nid!

Baby steps.

I mean, today, I'm motivated...I'm excited even...to get with some more talented musicians and jam.  Feeling and freestyling.

Then...I get to thinking too much and scare myself half to death with just the idea of being in front of people, my knees start shaking!

I'm a strange one, let me tell you.

The thing that brings me the most pleasure....is also the thing that scares the living shit out of me!

I guess that means I'm on the right track.

#life101

stay tuned...

♡.
me

Inspired to Write...

Life is a funny thing...

I've had some interesting experiences as of late...I'm not quite sure what the Universe is trying to tell me...sometimes I feel like I'm misinterpreting the signs.  But then again, why is everything that is so seemingly random, occurring so often?  Aside from that, I'm encountering a helluva lot of double and triple numbers.

more to come....

Saturday, January 29, 2011

Working Thru Resistance...

I'm currently feeling an incredible resistance in moving forward with pretty much everything in my life right now...especially my music.

I can't tell you what exactly is holding me in this spot...but whatever it is [fear], it's strong.  It's crazy.
I've been attempting to write my bio for [at least] a month now and every time I get to the page to begin, I stare at the blinking cursor and my mind shoots directly into outer space.  There's a part of me that is resisting because I don't like writing about myself...another part of me is resisting the same way I resist when it comes to writing a resume [it's an arduous task for me, I detest doing stuff like that]...and then there's something in me that has my hands and mind energetically tied.  
A friend of mine even offered to write my bio for me (which I was excited about and I absolutely appreciate), but shortly thereafter, the Universe delivers me a message "No one can write your life story better than you."

Dammit.

Now I really have to write this damn thing.

eh.

You would think it would be easy, but it's not. 
Not for me anyway.

All that runs thru my mind is "Why the hell do I need a bio anyway? Can't I just say that I'm from a galaxy far, far away and let that be it?"

So, there's that.

As I write this, my guides tell me that "Yes, I can...It's YOUR bio...say whatever you want!"

I realize that my hang up is "What will other people think? Those who 'know' me?" [Well, I know better than that! Let people say whatever they want.  At the end of the day, no one really knows me better than me.  I don't need to appease the masses with something that would make them feel more comfortable with something I'm saying or doing ESPECIALLY when it's about ME!]

::*side note*:: I just realized after reading the above paragraph, that this "dilemma" is all a head game.  My [egos] imagination has gone so far as to attach the idea that someone else find my bio unacceptable...when in fact, there IS NO "someone else"! It stems from a negative subconscious program of feeling inadequate.  When in fact, I know that I am always good enough...I am a divine being, here to create my own experience based on my own desires. ::*end side note*::

So, my bio's gonna be creative, beautiful, and from my heart. 
If it's not good enough for anyone other than me...fuckit!...it's gonna be good enough for me!


Writing.
This is how I work thru my resistance.

Thanks for reading!

kiss kiss bang bang!

me.
 
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