Sunday, May 31, 2009

Un Billet Pour Paris... (A Ticket To Paris...)

It's official. I've made the decision.

[July 15th, 2009 to be exact!]


Sooooo....why is part of me feeling a little scared?

Wellllll, [I say to mySelf] it's because I am making the most important decision of my life to date! I have officially decided to follow my dream and go for it.

Jump...and the net will appear. [dammit it better!] <--- fear!

Everything about my decision just feels right. When I think of the move I feel excited and happy. I can't help but smile and do a lil' jig. *grin*

But, then there are moments where I feel a tad nervous about the whole thing. It usually happens at night...just as I'm getting ready for bed. And, I know, for a fact, that it is a fear of the unknown. I know that it is completely natural to have a bit of OMFG! swirling about in my head. I mean, really. I'm moving to a country I've never been to, I don't speak the language [but I am working some Rosetta Stone magic] and I know absolutely no one. I have no clue where I'm going to live or who's picking me up from the airport. Hell, I don't even have my ticket yet!


I do know everything is already lined up for me. I know that as I arrive closer and closer to the day, everything will be in place...all I have to do is get there. I've already done my part. I've said YES! to my dream. The rest is up to the Universe.

This is truly, wholly and unequivocally a leap of faith. I am standing at the edge of my Life, ready to jump!

Behind me, lies all the things I've ever known and all the things I've ever done. In front of me lies the greatest mystery. I have NO CLUE what is going to happen. All I know is that I stand before a blank canvas and I am holding the paint brush.


Sunday, May 24, 2009

The Good, The Bad & The Ugly.

We are all each others mirrors. What you see in someone else--whether you consider it good or bad, positive or negative, beautiful or ugly, super fucking awesome or super fucking irritating--is always a reflection (on some level) of what is going on within you. With that said...I have uncovered some very interesting things within my current vibration.

The Good
...I am happy with these things & will continue to strengthen and expand upon them.

The Bad
...uh, yeah, it's fixy time.


The Ugly...has GOT TO GO!![!]

I could go on and on about all the good things and can toot my own horn any day[!] *winks*...that's easy. But, this entry is not about that. Today, my intention is set on shifting, transmuting, and releasing all undesirable behaviors, thoughts, and programs. So, I'm spilling my beans alllll over this bitch! ...and I'm adding the hot sauce, too!

Let's begin.

Mirror, mirror, on the wall...

*sidebar* I just noticed me creating a distraction for myself right now...I know it's my ego stalling cuz I'm 'bout to rip myself a new ass hole (figuratively, of course) and expose all of my I-don't-want-to-admit-this-to-myself shit. ......well, I say to my ego, "Gotcha, you sneaky mutha fucka! Caught you in the act! Who needs to clean their fingernails before typing a journal entry?? Really?"..."You LOSE!" *end*

I don't really know the best way to address all of these "issues", so I guess the best thing to do is start by listing them...then maybe I can go into detail [if necessary] afterward.

Here goes nothin'[!]....

I am not a good listener.
I don't always pay attention to what others are saying....and apparently don't care either.
I am not always considerate of others.
I interrupt people when they are talking.
I can be rude.
I need to be the center of attention at times.
I need validation from others.
I talk too much.
I can act like a big ass toddler and throw pouting tantrums.
I hold shit in & don't communicate my feelings.
I can be annoying.
I need people to acknowledge the "good things" I do for them/others & some how need to be commended for it. [WTF am I expecting? A medal...?!? A 21-gun salute...?!?]
I give with expectation.
I, to some extent, still rely on others to make me happy.
I still have issues with my ex.
I have not wholly embraced my beauty. Somewhere inside I still feel unattractive.
I am trying to avoid my unhappiness via a mind altering substance (in my case, this must be weed, cuz I don't drink anymore) and using, "cuz I like it" as my excuse...
I'm needy.
I can be energetically draining.
I can get lazy with my intelligence when I'm around certain people & I decide I am going to depend on them to do all the thinking for me on some level (even when it's SO ridiculously simple)...basically...I play dumb when I want. *brat*
I can be stingy.
I become defensive when confronted about me or something I did.
I sometimes think that the things I have to say are somehow more important and/or more interesting than what someone else has to say.
I'm a big fucking baby!
I still have dumb fears.
I focus on lack of money.
I am still saying "No" [in some, very important aspects] to the Universe.
I have trouble allowing others to do [nice] things for me.
I can be completely irrational sometimes. [Pain Bodies!]
I want to slap the shit out of myself sometimes.
I have too much pride.
I can be a total bitch.
I need more healing on my heart chakra.
I hold on to useless, unproductive, unhappy, unharmonious, losing relationships.
I allow others to use me...and then complain about it [usually to myself].
I don't feel appreciated...and feel the NEED to be appreciated.
I don't appreciate my self, fully.
I allow other's opinions (more so those whom I truly care about) influence my decisions to some degree (as it pertains to me)...<---I'm actually consciously working on this AND making progress! [*toot toot* had to. sorry.]
I'm too much of a people pleaser...still. *ack!*
I give unnecessary details.
I doubt my talents.
I don't give myself enough credit.



What a list! OMG. Some things on the preceeding list I am fully aware & conscious of...others are new to me as I write them here.

Well, it seems that I've got quite a few things to work on.


Friday, May 15, 2009


[this post was originally on another blog of mine...but I've decided to repost them here...mainly cuz I actually have READERS on this site! LOL]

Initially, I didn't really know exactly what I wanted this blog to be about. But, I knew it had to be something great. Not just because of the title, but also because of what vibr8highr represents--raising vibration. Raising my vibration...raising your vibration...raising the vibration of all humanity....thus raising the vibration of the entire planet and the Universe.

My intention for this blog is to spread Love--in all forms, to all forms.

Love is the highest possible frequency that we can achieve as Beings. [and, no, not just as human-beings...]

When I use the term "Love", I don't mean, "Oh, I looove my boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife/cat/dog/haircut...".

It's way beyond that.

When I say "Love", I am referring to our truest nature. The substance from which we were all created. The LOVE I am referring to embodies Joy, Peace, Light, Happiness, Bliss, Graciousness...Oneness. This kind of Love is beyond just a feeling. It is a BE-ing.

...and guess what?!

We ALL have the potential and ability to become this form of Love.[!]

While I am on this here planet, it is my intention and my goal to completely embody Love. I am choosing to return to my origin and become Love itself and overflow with it...radiating it...sharing It with every One and every Thing I encounter.

This is what vibr8highr is all about. Becoming your greatest potential. Returning to your origin. Re-membering who and what you really are.

So, please, I ask you kindly and lovingly to join me in my pursuits. Walk with me, side by side, with your heart wide open. Brothers and Sisters, please help me raise the frequency of our Mother, Earth. I can't do it all by myself....and there is no one else that can do it for us. So, let's work together and make this thing happen!

Who's with me?[!]

Thursday, May 14, 2009

To My Legions of Followers...!

...ok, maybe just Legion.

[how many have to be in a group to make it a legitimate legion anyway?]

Just wanted to thank you for reading!

You're awesome!!!

Monday, May 11, 2009

Sometimes I feel like I need to keep my mouth shut.

Other times....I'm like....fuck it. just say it.

Today, I did that.

And, it actually brought me into a new awareness of my Self. [that's the dope part, folks!]

I really learned what living freely is all about. I know the feeling of really not giving a fuck what someone else thinks I should do. ...and...That shit feels good!!!

You should do [it,this,that]... You shouldn't do [it,this,that]...

How you gonna tell ME what's best for Me?!? Who are you?[?!]

Please....allow me to have my experience. Thank you.

I, for the first time, I didn't feel a-n-y fear in speaking my truth...not even a little bit. I have really made a shift. I am really proud of myself. That, my friends, is a great feeling. [!]

evolution is wonderful. *cheez*

try's grand!


Saturday, May 9, 2009

Making It A Habit.

So, for the 3rd-ish day this week, I find myself sitting on the front patio of my building [there's an awesome wooden patio set with a green umbrella...and I get free wi-fi *grin*]. I've made it a point to come out here and get my creation on. I'm using this opportunity to do my freelance work, blogging and painting...and just be-ing. And, thru my new habit, I see a lot of interesting people walking and driving by. I listen to the lovely songs of all of the amazing birds in my neighborhood. I watch bees and butterflies flutter around and "do their thing". I listen to the wind blow thru the trees, rustling leaves. An occasional car horn honk saying "Move it you asshole!"...but politely, [LOL] cuz it's WeHo (...hey, it's 4pm in know what that means...rush hour...what do you expect?).

...I digress...

As part of my change...more appropriately, my evolution...I am making it a point to enjoy all the "amenities" my life has to offer. And, I must say, I am very much enjoying Life right now. [I guess that's why they use the term "freelance". *Woop woop!*]

This is how everyone should live in my book. Do your thing, be creative, be your own Being. Live life for all Its ammenties. The money comes, it always does...and it comes faster when you release the fear. The Universe is abundant and provides for all of Its inhabitants.

So don't fret. You are always taken care of. We are always taken care of!

As long as you KNOW're good.

SO, bring your ass outside and chillax for a minute! Enjoy your surroundings. Smile more and talk to more people. Talk to the birds and the butterflies and every living thing around you! Believe me, they are listening...& if you just Be and allow yourself to listen....maybe you'll be able to hear what they are saying to you...[!]


Friday, May 8, 2009

Ever Evolving, Always Unfolding...

Wow. What can I say? I am really doing this shit. I'm completing my 3rd day of the Master Cleanse and my consciousness has just bumped up another level.


I've said it a million times before, "I know I'm going to end up a vegetarian." ...and, for some reason, it kinda bummed me out. I am only now realizing, it was due to a fear-based program, also known as, Fear Of Missing Out. And, as I write this entry, I am laughing my MUTHA FUCKIN ASS OFF...cuz, if you go to one of my earlier posts, you will see me in a T-mobile web spot entitled, "F.O.M.O.", meaning exactly that[!]...Which, by the way, is a dirty little program I had been operating with...up until now, of course. *wink*

[♪♪ Connect the dots! La, la la la! ♪♪]

"But meat is so gooood," It says. "You'll be missing out on...[sushi, steaks, jerk chicken, oxtails, curry goat, chicken soup, fried fish, tuna melts, shrimp kabobs, cheeseburgers,etc.] ...blah, blah, blah."

Well, guess what!?...I'm cool.
I'm not missing out on shit!

As I so nimbly progress and evolve into vegetarianism [you like that, right?! *wink*], I'm realizing that there's WAY more to it than just giving up a hot skillet of delicately flavored flesh. [yuck!] ...and when I say things like that, it makes me want to be a veg EVEN MORE! It's a completely spiritual connection and evolution for me. How can I honor an animal by consuming it? This is nonsensical. [Good Morning!] It's impossible.

If I were to eat a piece of meat right now [& going forward], in my state of awareness, I would be eating it knowing exactly what it was that I was doing. It's like kicking a baby or something. You know it's, why would you want that karma? [*please note* The preceding comment was solely in regards to my beliefs for me in my experience...and has absolutely nothing to do with you and what the hell you decide to do in your life.]

I've been awakening rapidly since the day I decided to start this cleanse. I can already feel the shift and I am noticing the little changes that have been occurring in my consciousness. The day I set out on this mission, I set a goal...and not a goal that I needed a checklist for or a scale or any other physical accoutrement to accompany my progress...but a significant and poignant goal for myself...with an end date...July birthday...Mon Anniversaire! The end of an era...and the beginning of a new one!

I am so very excited.[!]

I can guarantee you that you will see a very different, freer, more not-giving-a-flying-foie-gras-what-anyone-thinks-about-who-I-am-vs.-who-they-want-me-to-be Being. [by the way, what is the longest possible sentence you can hyphenate in such a manner? ...maybe a world record?]

...moving on...

As I was saying, I set a goal. Something real and attainable for mySelf...and I'm allowing it to happen in a revealing manner. I travel toward this destination [my birthday], I am becoming increasingly more aware of my surroundings. How things change around I change among these "things" ...from my growing awareness with nature & becoming one with tuning myself with my inner Being [my internal environment] being more aware of how my external environment changes along the way to reaching my goal. All the while, NOT creating any boundaries or limitations or parameters within which to fall. It will be completely organic. Getting to know my true Self as she is revealed to me, thru me. Watching the Goddess unfold right before my eyes. [*excitement*]

I am already fascinated with how much my beliefs and thoughts on things have changed in the last four days. Let alone within the last 2 weeks.[!] A lot of my revelations have been instant. Like waking up at a snapping of a finger...



*sidebar* Shine and I went down to the waters of Palos Verdes last week [Weds April 29th-for my own time keeping purposes] and charged our crystals and feathers in a ritual honoring the Earth, the Goddesses, the Gods, and the Universe. It was absolutely AMAZING to say the least...and now, I am already seeing the shift - a major shift. GO CREATION!! *end*

So, really, what I'm getting at is that I have new "knowings". I wrote in my journal once..."A belief can be changed. A knowing cannot." Once you know can't un-know it. With that said, I definitely won't be going backward any point. You know, falling back into a bucket of chicken. I have seen glimpses of my veggie future and I'm well on my way to a raw food diet.

But[!] step at a time! Going raw will change your life forever...! I hear stories of amazing magical experiences once you go raw. [shame on you! ...dirty!]

But, alas! I will allow the progression naturally...especially cuz I want some vegan soul food[!]...and cold collard greens DO NOT sound appealing to me! [but I'll eat 'em!]


Thursday, May 7, 2009

Dreeeeamin' On A Thursday Afternoooon...!

My horoscope for today:

Thursday, May 7th, 2009 --
Something strange is happening in your dreams and you aren't yet sure what it means. New images are arising from the depths of your subconscious and it's pointless to try to integrate the symbols. But don't just relegate them to the dustbin; roll them around in your fantasies and see where they take you. You might not know the final destination, but at least you can begin to explore the emotions that are now coming to the surface.

SO true!!

I've been having some very interesting dreams the past few nights. I do feel like they've been giving me a lot of answers and insight. Only a few I recall, however, and this may sound weird to some...but DURING the actual dream, I am consciously gaining knowledge from it. When I wake up in the morning, I lay in bed for a few minutes reflecting on what I just learned. But, if you were to ask me what my dream was about, I couldn't tell you....because I've forgotten it. However, I have this intuitive knowing that I have somehow retained what I've learned from the dreams. Trippy, right?

I just had to share.

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Veggie Tales

I've done it....I have proclaimed it to the world [!]... (well, at least on Facebook and Twitter, and now, here...)

I am a vegetarian!


I knew it was only a matter of time before I decided to buckle down and actually do it once and for all. I've been looking at a few websites and blogs in search of recipes and such, and I am actually really excited about being a Veg. [Yay, Me!] Beyond that, my spiritual evolution has allowed me to realize that I'd just rather eat food that comes from Mama Nature herself, anyway. Everything we could ever possibly need is provided by the abundance[!]....No chemicals or processing necessary. Plus, I don't care to eat any more dead meat. I'm cool.

I'll be honest, I'm not sure if I'm ready to go straight vegan though. I do love me some cheese, butter, and eggs (cage-free of course)! I still have to do a bit of research on the latter, however...cuz at this point, from what I understand, most eggs are "blanks"...meaning no baby chicken embryo chillin' (literally) in my fridge. And, as far as cheese and butter don't have to kill any cows or goats to get it. As long as the cheese is from happy cows...I'm good. Plus, I'm not convinced that soy cheese is so delicious either. *ack*

But, like I've said a million times's a journey. I'll get there [vegan] one day I'm sure.

Annnnnyway, for those of you who are are a few of the websites & blogs I came across......and found interesting (cuz that's important *wink*)

By Any Greens Necessary {BAGN for short}

Vegan Yum Yum

Fatfree Vegan Kitchen

When I was reading thru blog posts on BAGN, I found out about a cookbook called Vegan Soul Kitchen by Bryant Terry. It sounds interesting (and my hope is that the recipes are muy delicioso). I'll have to go to Barnes & Noble and check it out. I figure this...if there is a recipe for macaroni and cheese...that's vegan...and it tastes so good you wanna fight somebody...I'll go vegan in a heartbeat!

Peas & Love, y'all!

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

...In Response...

2 of which I myself just learned [ it came to me when I began to formulate this comment]

1) EXPECT something GOOD...and you WILL receive it. [this is an "always must"!]


2) BELIEVE yourSelf when you are saying your affirmations and stating your intentions.

I'm speaking to both of us when I say this...

It's one thing to say something, in this case, our affirmations etc, in an attempt to change our circumstances....we think, "Ooh, if I just say this over and over, things will change...!" But if we don't truly, and unequivocally BELIEVE what we are saying...then, it really won't mean shit[!!]. And, THAT is what's real.

It's the feeling, the emotional connection, to the words we speak and the thoughts we have (conscious or unconscious) that determine our course.

I can connect with the way you are feeling...I'm going thru my version of it over here [as you know from my rants]. I found myself saying the same "something" over and over and "meaning it" every time...but nothing changed. And, I always wondered why.

Well, today, it hit me...and it wasn't until AFTER I consciously changed my feeling about my situation and then acted upon that feeling, that I recognized what was really going on. It was an instant manifestation and I acknowledged it...which in turn, made the "something" more real...I shifted and I actually felt the difference...thus beginning a new cycle.

We all have to recognize and acknowledge our progress as we make it. Many of us don't do that...hence why we continue standing there with our eyes closed wondering why we can't see anything.

We don't give ourselves enough credit during the process of our evolution and don't notice the "small stuff". We must pay even closer attention to our ability to manifest what we want in our lives. Every step counts and every step is important.

We need not judge ourselves so harshly either...there is nothing to "fix", because we are not broken. We are learning. We are remembering who and what we really are....through our experiences, through our evolution.

You are not Humpty Dumpty, you didn't fall and shatter into a million pieces, in need of super glue. You came here and got covered in "muck" (aka really shitty programming), and you are now shedding layers of false reality and uncovering your true Self.

Embrace that!

I am very inspired and encouraged by your writing. It keeps me motivated to keep on keepin' on with my ramblings as well!

We are all truly helping one another by publicly scribing our honesty with ourselves...taking responsibility out loud, if you will. If I'm encouraged, that means someone else is too! ...which, in turn, encourages you to keep on keepin' on! ...and so on and so on...

...and the beat goes onnnnn! ;o)

Love & Light


A Change Is Comin'...

I am happy to report that I am very inspired right now.

I am ready for change. And, boy oh boy is it gonna be a biggun! I've got a rough outline of what my role is in all of it......the Universe will handle the rest. Beginning right now, at this very moment, I've already put it all in the works. Tomorrow morning is Day 1 of Master Cleanse [yes, I'm doing it again...but I'm doing it RIGHT this time!]. Once I'm off the cleanse, I'm going vegetarian...bye-bye blood and bones!

This week, maybe tomorrow or Weds...but definitely by Thursday[LOL], I am starting yoga again.....and doing it regularly. And[!], I'm getting my bike, too.[!] My workout routine will be in full swing by this time next week. I'm getting my shit together, yo! I'm over the bullshit for serious!

Come July 5th [my me presents] you will see a whole new me! We will both be surprised, let me just say that right now....mark my words! ...2 months and learn muthafuckas!


Saturday, August 8th is my 1st art show! (Thanks, Tiffany!!) So, over the next 3 months I will be painting my ass off in preparation. I am VERY excited about this. I will be writing about my painting experience and posting pictures on my other blog stay tuned for that! Wooop wooop!

I am EXTREMELY excited for this change that has already begun. I promise I will be writing more blogs too! (Thanks to Mark for kicking my ass in blogs!)




Frustration is a bub-lin'!

I want to shave my head and move to France. [!]
(one does not relate directly to the other...FYI)

...but then, I don't....[at least for the moment]

I have a conundrum of feelings milling about my heart chakra right now...and it makes me want to jump out of my body and run for the hills! ...well, actually, the stars in this case.

Sometimes I get so frustrated with being here it annoys me. The 3rd dimension is a mutha fucker sometimes! I swear.

I'm in between programs...shifting my consciousness...out with the old, in with the new...and this feeling that I have swirling around is really...well, I don't actually know how to articulate it. It's like a grayish cloud (think incense smoke but thicker) swirrrrling about inside my chest. It makes me cry, it makes me want to punch pillows, it makes me want to shave all my hair off and run around screaming like a madwoman!! I can't do enough cartwheels to make it go away!! I wish I could just open my ribcage and pull it out. ...but you can't do that with feelings. *argh!*

I know it's just my false self clinging on for dear life. It's fighting for sameness, holding on to the fear, resisting the change. My ego is a mutherfucker, man.[!] It enjoyed my "old" life...It thrived there...It reigned supreme. Now, It sees that It's not winning. It is not in control......I am. My TRUE Self is taking over...becoming, evolving, shining, allowing, enjoying, BEing, my truth.

I know this is all a process...and I'm definitely in it for the long haul. I've got a lot of work to do on this planet and I'm far from a quitter. Life is a game, an adventure...this shit is supposed to be's meant to be played and experienced and IN JOYed.

So...I make fun, I have fun....

Yes, I do have my moments...(as you can see above)...but that's all part of the experience. Life isn't a complicated chess game...nor should it be. And, it's not a game of Hungry Hungry Hippo either (the one with the most balls at the end, wins). It's not that serious. In fact, it's not serious at all!

We all have our shit storms and sometimes we feel like jumping out of a basement window, but it's all in the name of experience and eternal growth.

With that said...

I feel much better.
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